Sumptuousness!!!

A few days ago, while i was watching CNBC 'Fast Money,' i noticed a plethora of exclusive items of 'Nordstrom' that the team was threshing out. So, I decided to unearth what's all the fuss about this high-net-worth retail website. The collection of men's aparels, i discovered, was quite voluminous. "As a professional trader, i have to rack-in a lucrative bonus package to be able to buy these baroque sh**ts," i said to myself. All of a sudden, one of our friends named 'Macky Jr.' (to decipher his name, 'South Park' episode with Mr. Macky is recommended) interrupted, "Why are you checking out these classy outfits? i like to wear them, but you guys call me gay." In few words, Macky Jr. would be a classic character in our gang with few eccentric attributes--a slander, diminutive '4o year old virgin' who still lives with his parents; who has asinine senses of humor; who is an epicure vegetarian and I-Hoper but is a cheap-jack, often obscenely, when it comes to tipping the waitresses; who loves to play tennis with his pink 'Vanessa Williams' tennis racket and is very fond of wearing women's sunglasses while driving. Nevertheless, when it comes to shopping, he has a disrepute of driving 100 miles to get to an infamous outlet mall where he would purchase frugal and eclectic 'Homo' brands like 'Banana Republic,' 'GAP,' 'Express' etc. Once, when i asked why he bought that comely pair of sandals, he took me aback and replied, "those are some classy stuff!" If i'm not wrong, nondescript style might be cool in its austereness, but cheesy 'stuff' exhibit nothing but garish and gaudy--they are no way 'Classy.' So, in a search for true sumptuousness, below is what i've found from a trader's magazine:

'Classiness Defined'

Ermengildo Zegna

Grey pinstriped suit $2,195

Blue shirt $225

Herringbone cashmere overcoat $5,895

Purple/brown tie with stripes $155

Black reversible leather belt $125

Seamaster Planet Ocean Chrono $16,ooo by Omega

Ascent Ti phone $6,300, by Vertu.

Black trench coat $3,600 by Salvatore Ferragamo

Dunhill

Black trousers $2,050

Black-striped French cuff button-down dress shirt $175

Navy blue tie with rectangles $125

Seal-logo silver cufflinks $215

Seemingly, the $50G sartorial budget might be little notorious; nonetheless, chilling out with glamorous girlfriends at HARRY'S is priceless!

Time to hit abroad

In recent months, we have witnessed some large-scale take-overs and investments in the world financial market. Dubai, a tiny nation of UAE, is buying out big stakes in the global equity market--8% stake in AMD and $7.8 billion investment in the Citigroup's fu*ked up subprime credit mess are their few of the recent ventures and, overall 20% stake in NASDAQ and 28% in LSE are quite a show off. According to Jon Najarian of Fast Money CNBC, Dubai is most likely to be the next biggest Financial Hub in the world. It seems to be the petro dollar knows no rules. Talking about petro money; Fidel Castro's strong arm President Hugo Chavez of Venezuela has been repudiated in the recent election. His resolution to remain in power for the rest of his life and indoctrinate the oil revenue of the nation have been imperiled. However, the outcome has stabilized the market in the region and, consequently, the emerging market bond yield-spread has bounced from 31 to 500 points in Venezuela. In the other corner of the globe, Czar Putin and his entourage have won a landslide victory in the parliamentary election--a green light for him to stay on power or to assign one of his lieutenants to follow his dogma. According to the insider info, his prominent role in the strong national economy and staggering popularity would aggrandize the nation's future economy. Government protectionism and distaste from the western power for its international policies would not divert the surge of the Russian economy for the next years to come. Unless, we discover something capricious in the Persian nation of Iran--the only state that is recalcitrant to the almighty u.s and hasn't been subdued yet--that could derail the path of the New Prosperity. Nevertheless, according to the new intelligence report, Iran could be exonerated for its contumacious behavior in the American Empire. It appears to be, 'Mr. Garrison' and the 'Xerxes' have buried the hatchet and interlaced in a irascible bond. Which means; EU and Russia will obsequiously reverse their bias policies with this nation and, China and India will supervene the norm.

So, the ax here is quite lucid--roll your dice prudently in the emerging markets and uncloak an astonishing return of 100-300% from your investment. By the way, don't forget to throw some of your carrots in my basket.

The equation of big banks' crash: f(big loss)=?

f(big loss) =

∑ (High dependency on the Quant Retards) + (Treating Ivy League College grad CEOs as GODs) + (Lack of strategies in the World Macro) + (Extreme Arrogance of Domestic Micro) +…..Political Quagmire, Federal Reserve Policies……

= Internal Subprime and Credit Crisis

= Billions of Dollars of Corporate Write-Downs

The other day

It was really early--3 AM in the shivering fu*king cold morning, i was watching CNBC and was cloying the 'Sweetness' of the u.s dollar in its intermittent phase of declivity. My eyes whimsically descried an Indian 'Chic,' in an exotic happiness, appearing as a connoisseur on the news room. I forgot her exact name--probably 'Sheetal' (pronounced as 'Sh*t-all'). She was briefing from Singapore and was quite cogently forewarning everyone that our fair-haired '$Dollar$ was about to yield to the 'Pussy Canadian Dollar' and 'Gay Japanese Yen.' I was nascent in 'Forex' trading but was trenchant to excogitate the market turbulence. So, i decided arbitrarily to play around with the ebullience of the market volatility through the power of 'Macro' and, at the same time, defend the eternal $Bling$ of my dollar currency portfolio. Ok, here we go--i've sanguinely clicked the button on my laptop and executed a trade worth of 1.5 million Yen. Now, i have to circumspectly find the exit strategy before the u.s economy subverts in to a recession. The crescendo of tension rises--i might lose, in just a matter of few hours, more than $100k for my cupidity. However, my trust on the dollar's strength remain impulsive. So, i held my breath and relaxed in a perceptive speculation--there ain't going to be a recession in the history of u.s economy any time soon.
Around 3:30 AM, i heard the Japanese-British accent of a 'Hot Asian Chic' from the Breaking-News room in Hong Kong. She ostentatiously uttered, "The biggest investment bank in Japan has been convoluted by the u.s subprime credit crunch." So, it became salient to me that Yen would recursively follow the insurrection of Dollar and, the anomaly would be unequivocally ephemeral. Hell with the technical analysis; finally, it was time to relish my sweet early morning sleep in a hope to wake up with a windfall of $20k at or around 9 AM.

Very close call--$19.6 G; well, that was quite opulent to break couple bottles of early 1900's single malts. Nevertheless, i could only set my eyes upon the accumulated stack; haplessly, this hardcore trading was just a f**king simulation.

See you in Wall Street

I know, this would be indubitably the toughest gamble--either in a delusion of billion dollars or in reality--to become a professional trader in the contrary of others' dogma and undeniable heterodox. I've pondered precipitously if my eclectic ability to root out the market psychology would exalt me ahead of the starving 'Marvins' from the ivy league schools, hungry for Wall Street jobs. I'm not an iconoclast but can tenaciously pursue an assigned task in its behemoth. My effrontery resolutes vehemently when 'the Sheer Suckers' fear to deal or deal to lose. So, i get my head in the game with 'All-in.'
First, i have been contemplating to seize an internship at Lehman or Bear Sterns to learn the paradox of the trading world. However, as far as i know, it is ostensibly a precarious destination. All the top tier MBAs flock there in a fierce competition. The few that survive, become the 'Marines' on the ground. So, the chance of landing my foot-step in there, with an undergraduate degree, might remain as a beguile mystery. However, it neither makes me insipid nor obviates my path to the 'Big Game.' My intrepid interest to leverage the risk and manipulate intractable trading methods keep me more in touch with the entire industry. I've recently started trading in simulations; regardless, my scrupulous trading strategies are generating 'Big $Gs' in this market volatility. Hope, this would add an extra credential to my public college MBA degree which is yet to be earned. So, i feel exuberant in a hope to join at least a fourth-tier investment bank. Nevertheless, lately, even the retail banks have the audacity to ask applicants from HBS or YSOM; let alone bulge bracket investment banks or the small boutiques. So, being a total zealot for trading would hardly amplify my credibility unless my degree is in conformity with the coterie of ivy leaguers.
In the end of the day, there is only the resentment to impugn this bias with imprecations. So, I invite, to the 'Insider's Ax,' those, who have the knack but can't afford to buy one of those prodigal 'mutha fu*ka $100k MBA' packages. Let's exploit this industry's 'MS Excel bullsh*its' or their so called daredevil Fibonacci numbers. All the 'Chris Gardners' out there, watch 'The Pursuit of Happiness' and keep up the dream; nonetheless, don't be a diffident. One day, i don't know when, you will discover your destiny.